Refined Language

Our son took a lovely young woman out on a date. It was the first date and the last, because a few mildly coarse words peppered her speech. It was a deal breaker for our son. I’ve been thinking lately about the need for refinement of speech. The selection of words spewing from our mouths reveals what we are inside. That is what the Savior Jesus Christ taught: “Those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man” (Matthew 15:18). And consider this statement: “Language most shows a man. Speak, that I may see thee” (Ben Jonson). How we speak reflects our true selves. Though I would not swear or use the Lord’s name in vain, I want to avoid even using alliterative, substitute words for the Lord’s sacred name. Also, I don’t want to use coarse or crude words—in surprise or exclamation, or in reference to body parts—even though these words are commonplace. How easy it is to become desensitized from hearing coarse and crude language in school, in the media, and in public everywhere. But this is no excuse to lower one’s personal standard. “Refinement of speech is reflected not only in our choice of words, but also in the things we talk about. Refinement of speech is more than polished elocution. It results from purity of thought and sincerity of expression” (Douglas Callister). When in doubt about the appropriateness of using certain words, I will remember the message of this simple child’s hymn: If the Savior stood beside me, would I say the things I say…if I could see the Savior standing nigh, watching over me?”

2 thoughts on “Refined Language

  1. Luana Rogers

    Thank you for a great reminder, Lois. I especially appreciate the quote by Douglas Callister. He is our former Temple President and is what he teaches—-as is his wife, Jan.

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